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WANT TO BE A PERFECT PARENT? August 5, 2016

Posted by Carole Lynne in All About Spirit, Feeling Better, Grief, Love, mediumship, practical action, Spiritual Awakening, Spiritual Priority, Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, Uncategorized, Worries.
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Pain of Regret Healing.png

HEALING THE PAIN OF REGRET ~  FROM A MEDIUM’S PERSPECTIVE

Painful photo? YES as the pain of regret IS very painful. Everything I have learned from BEING a parent and everything I have learned from the messages of apology that come through from loved one’s in eternal life to their children still living has taught me: there is no such thing as a perfect parent. And there is no such thing as a perfect human being. At least I have never met such a unique creature. ( In fact those parading around as perfect spiritual guru’s frighten me the most.)

SOOOOOOOO, should we stop TRYING because we can’t be perfect? If you say “yes” to that –  it is the same as being on a healthy diet, having something not so healthy to eat and then deciding all is lost so you might as well food binge for the next month.

FACE THE PAIN OF REGRET: Think about that ONE DAY that changed your whole life, at least it seemed like it did. You made a mistake. If only you could take that day back. The movie of that day plays over and over in your mind, year after year. This was a day you made a mistake as a parent.  There may have been other mistakes on other days, but this one day looms large on the horizon of your visions of the mistakes you made.

Do those mistakes matter now? Of course they matter now, but if you have faced your mistakes, have become a more balanced person, apologized for your mistakes, then it is high time that you FORGIVE YOURSELF even if you are not forgiven by others.

FORGIVE YOURSELF AND PERHAPS YOU WILL BEGIN TO FORGIVE YOUR OWN PARENTS

Were your parents perfect? Most likely not. Did they make mistakes that you have never forgiven them for in your heart. (It goes without saying that if you have been brutally abused you may not be able to forgive.)  But for the better part of us who had parents that ranged from close to perfect to emotionally abusive due to untreated mental illness or personality disorders: we have parents who loved us but who make mistakes that changed our lives in the same way that our mistakes changed the lives of our children.  It is amazing how we begin to understand and forgive the mistakes of our parents as we begin to understand our own mistakes AS parents.

As a medium I can tell many stories about the loved ones who come through in readings with very specific apologies to their living children. And as these loved ones in spirit are able to apologize it appears to me that they are able to move on in the never ending spiritual growth in Eternal Life.

YOU reading this, are still living and so you have the opportunity to apologize NOW.  You have the chance to forgive yourself NOW.

FORGIVE YOURSELF AND PERHAPS YOU WILL BEGIN TO FORGIVE YOUR CHILDREN

If you have children who have reached adulthood, have they been perfect children? Have they always treated you and other members of the family well? Most likely they have not as they are human beings like the rest of us and they are not perfect. As you forgive yourself for not being perfect, you may begin to forgive not only your parents, but your children.

And if your grown children are parents, most likely they will not become perfect parents as they are human beings and there are no perfect human beings.

I DISAGREE WITH MANY OF MY COLLEAGUES WHO BELIEVE EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

There are colleagues in my field who believe that every thing we do, we do for the reason of learning, and everything that happens is meant to happen. I am not able to go along with that idea, and from my perspective there is absolutely no way to prove that concept. When someone is brutally abused I cannot accept that this was “meant to be.”

What I do accept is that we do not have control over all that happens in life. What we have more control over is how we respond to what happens.  And if we have behaved badly it was not written someplace in eternity that we were meant to behave badly. We must face our actions, cope with our regret, change our behaviors, and eventually forgive ourselves.  And if others have hurt us, depending on the severity of the circumstances, we need to find our way to forgiveness as much as we possibly can.

Let us focus on forgiving ourselves, and forgiving others. And while facing the regret, also focus on facing the reality that no one is perfect: I am not perfect, you are not perfect, they are not perfect. No one is perfect. Accepting our imperfect reality brings HEALING.

DEAR READERS: This post cannot possibly contain all of the many stories about different kinds of mistakes: mistakes we have made ourselves and the many ways we have suffered from the mistakes made by others.  Not even a whole book could include all of the mistakes human beings make. The topic of mistakes can be overwhelming, but we can make a start by accepting who we are as human beings and work to become better people making less mistakes.

 

 

 

 

WASTED ENERGY TRYING TO FIT IN July 27, 2016

Posted by Carole Lynne in Author Carole Lynne, Feeling Better, Spiritual Awakening, Spiritual Priority, Uncategorized.
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Looking in Our Own Eyes

LOOK IN THE MIRROR. Look into your own eyes. Realize that each time you try to FIT IN to a role, situation or relationship that you really do not want, you are giving up part of yourself. And as you give up part of yourself, that uses up a lot of vital energy within you.WHAT would you do with that energy that is now being wasted as you try to fit in? How would you “spend” that energy if you could free that wasted energy up from having to do the horrible job of trying to make you be someone else?

Of course there ARE some situations and relationships that you are not going to leave for good reason. But if you are like me and many of those I consult with, there IS room for improvement in your personal journey: the journey to become more of who you really are. And there ARE many roles, situations and relationships that you CAN change.

I think of myself as being very different. And perhaps this is a fantasy as maybe most people think they are different. Perhaps we are all the same in that we all think we are different. No matter what the answer to this riddle is: we can all become more of who we really are!

I have come a long way in being who I am. When I was younger never would I have imagined that as an older person I would be a psychic medium out there in the world: a working medium and a published author. I know many people who are psychic and mediumistic who are afraid to admit their spiritual gifts even to themselves. I remember the years when I was deciding if I was willing to write books, be on television and radio and be know publicly or remain a kind of closeted medium that very few people would find out about.  It was a bit scary to come out as a psychic medium. Not everyone was going to approve of me, some people would say I was a freak or wacko.

LET US ASK OURSELVES LIFE CHANGING QUESTIONS: What would my life look like if I was being more of who I really am? Would I still be working in the same kind of job. would I be working at all, who would I be spending time with, what would my schedule look like, what relationships would I let go of and what kinds of relationships would I be looking for? WHAT WOULD CHANGE? There are as many answers to these questions as there are people who are willing to look themselves in the eyes and ask the questions.

LIFE IS SHORT SO DO NOT WAIT: I kinda understood that life is short when I was younger, but with years of experience as a psychic medium communicating with the spirits of those who have passed on, I really know that life is short.  And with years of comforting clients who are mourning the passing of a loved one: I know now that life is short.  Of course I have also been in deep grief over the passing of my own loved ones, and each time another of my family or friends makes a transition into eternal life, I learn once again that life is short. 

Don’t misunderstand this message. It is not a message that begs you to turn your whole life upside down in a day. It is a message that says “LOOK INTO YOUR OWN EYES AND SEE WHO YOU ARE. BECOME MORE OF WHO YOU ARE IN YOUR EVERYDAY LIFE AS LIFE IS SHORT.”

 

Seven Tips for Changing Your Life March 27, 2011

Posted by Carole Lynne in All About Spirit, Feeling Better, nature, SEVEN WAYS AND SEVEN DAYS, Spiritual Awakening, Uncategorized.
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Want to change your life? You CAN!!  Number 1: believe you can change your life. If  you do not believe it, then forget the whole thing and do not try to change your life.  If you can believe it, then proceed. Number 2: get out a notebook or open a file on your computer and list three things you would like to change about your life. When you get a good start on the first three, you will be adding more items to this list, but lets begin with three things you would like to change.  Even listing three things may be overwhelming at first, but if you can keep your sense of humor, you CAN get through this step.  As you make this list, keep in mind that it may take many years to accomplish everything on your current and future lists, but if you believe you can change your life, you will.  Now come now, be realistic and do not put things such as “win a million dollars in the lottery” on your list.  List goals that are realistic. 

Now proceed to step 3:  Accept that you and those around you may not like the changes you are about to make.  For instance, if one of the things on your list is to give up smoking,  at first you may not enjoy giving up smoking (THAT is an understatement!)  and your friends who smoke will not like it when you give up smoking, however much praise they may heap on you. Deep down inside your smoking friends want you to smoke so that they have a smoking buddy.  As you stop smoking, your smoking buddies may be confronted by their own addiction, and that is not alot of fun.

On  to step 4:  Give yourself a talking to and accept the fact that all of life is not about what you like, dislike and what you want.  Yes, you may want a cigarette, or whatever else it is that may not be any good for you, but what is more important, your health or your desires?  I know a young woman who can hardly breathe these days, but she is bound and determined to have that cigarette, because she WANTS it and of course is addicted. This woman needs to make a decision to get professional help in order to change her life. But SHE has to make that decision that what she wants each day is not as important as finding a way to do what is good for her in the long run.

If you are now reaching step 5, you are ready to start enforcing the DO IT NOW button in your brain, in your left toe, in fact everywhere within you your mind-body and spirit.  In this step you will need to train yourself to take the actions that are in harmony with the changes  you want to make.  For instance if you have been sitting around like a couch potato watching TV or playing computer games, when you need to look for work, you need to push your DO IT NOW button and get off your you know what, and out the door to look for work.  Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is too late: DO IT NOW, NO EXCUSES. 

Or if the change you want to make is physical, such as losing fifty pounds, you need to DO IT NOW.  Losing weight is a moment to moment challenge. You need to go to the store and buy the right foods, cook them and eat them. In the moment, you need to say NO to ice cream and yes to a lovely plate of steamed veggies, which by the way can taste heavenly with a small amount of Smart Balance and some shredded parmesan cheese.  (Yummy)  IT IS IN THE NOW that you need to say no to eating something that someone in your family has spent a whole day slaving over a hot stove just for YOU.  To prevent such dramatic confrontations, tell your loved ones you are going to lose weight and tell them what you can or cannot eat. In this way your family cook is forewarned and if he or she makes something for you that you have already said you cannot eat, then guess what, it is the cook’s problemo, not yours!

Step 6:  When you reach step 6 you are well on  your way to changing your life. You have been changing your habits, and now unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately for some of you) you are going to need to make changes in your relationships.  Like attracts like, so if you are not hanging out with positive people who want to make healthy and positive choices, then it is time to start hanging out with more folks who do want to make positive changes.  This does not mean you should leave your family, but find the members of the family to hang out with the most, who will be helpful to you as you change your life.  And watch what happens: as you change yourself for the better, many of those folks in your circle of family and friends, will follow your example. It may take a year or two, but you could be the leader in  your circle of loved ones to turn things around.  If you may a change, you become a role model for others. Do NOT preach to others: just change your life for the better, and speeches will not be necessary.

Yippee we are at step 7:      Step 7 is simple: a no brainer.  Keep on doing steps 1 through 6.  In other words, step 7 is all about keep on truckin”!”  Keep believing in yourself.  Keep knowing that the God of your understand is there for you and can help you change your life into a better life.

(if you think this message would help a friend, please pass it on)

www.carolelynne.com

www.carolelynnecosmicconnection.com

A Friendship Ends February 26, 2010

Posted by Carole Lynne in Grief, Love, Uncategorized.
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“I need to step away from my very good friend as she has hurt my feelings once too often.  Our friendship can never be the same after what she said to me recently.”

Ending a long time friendship is a very painful experience, but an experience that one must cope with if a friend is not acting like a friend any longer.

When a friendship ends and you look back over the years,  you realize that the recent event that was SO upsetting, has simply become the straw that breaks the camels back, or the drop of water that finally makes the water spill.  You realize that over the years there have been little hurts that you simply let go because after all “this is my good friend.”  You have made excuses for your friend, and have continued to carry the weight of the relationship, often feeling as if you are chasing after your friend.

Finally the day comes when you have grown and matured to the point where you can no longer let these hurts that are inflicted on you….go.  You have reached the end of your rope and suddenly all of the little hurts that have accumulated over the years, join together with the recent incident, and you HAVE HAD IT!!!!!   You may ask yourself why you are getting so upset, but when you realize that this recent incident is one of  many you have not dealt with before, then you understand your anger has built up over a long period of time.

“I should have told my friend years ago how she was upsetting me, but I didn’t. Now it is too late to mend this friendship” you cry inside. And it is too late.

Perhaps it is not a tragedy. Perhaps the friendship served both you and your friend for many years, and now the relationship simply does not serve either one of you.  It is okay to let go and move on. Life will take you down different paths now, and perhaps you will meet again and perhaps you will not. Life is like that: we do not know what will happen.

But there are tears and it does hurt.  But you know deep inside it is time to move on.

Psychic Medium and Inspirational Author Carole Lynne

www.carolelynne.com

www.carolelynnecosmicconnection.com

Cycles of Life January 31, 2010

Posted by Carole Lynne in All About Spirit, Feeling Better, Grief, Spiritual Awakening, Uncategorized.
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When your eyes are full of tears

When your eyes are full of rain

Remember that life changes

Things will never stay the same

Whatever life brings now

Tomorrow it will veer

The path will circle round

Untill happiness appears

Always moving, always changing, always moving.

Psychic Medium and Inspirational Author Carole Lynne

Author of Cosmic Connection: Messages for a Better World, Consult Your Inner Psychic: Make Your Life Work Better, How to Get a Good Reading From a Psychic Medium and Heart and Sound.

www.carolelynne.com

Making Waves? January 7, 2010

Posted by Carole Lynne in Feeling Better, Grief, practical action, Spiritual Awakening, Uncategorized.
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Waves roll in naturally, one after the other.  We cannot control the waves of the ocean. Sometimes they are calm while at other times fierce.  Waves are like life, always changing.

If we could only learn to ride the waves of our lives we would be much happier.  We cannot always control circumstances but we can influence how we react to all the changes life brings.

Psychic Medium and Inspirational Author Carole Lynne

www.carolelynne.com

www.carolelynnecosmicconnecction.com

The Doorway November 2, 2009

Posted by Carole Lynne in All About Spirit, Author Carole Lynne, Spiritual Awakening, Uncategorized.
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Fall Trip 2009 020 Door way 1 edited

BEFORE you walk through the doorway

NOTICE where you are

BE AWARE of how you feel

TAKE A MENTAL PICTURE of your life

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NOW WALK THROUGH THE DOOR WAY

SENSE the difference in the enviroment

EXPLORE your new surroundings

NOTICE how you are changing

PRAISE yourself for walking through the doorway

CONTINUE on in this new place until it is time to walk through another opening into a new life

Psychic Medium and Inspirational Author Carole Lynne

www.carolelynne.com

www.carolelynnecosmicconnection.com